11 Similarities Between Politics and Potty Training

What do politics have to do with potty training? Great question. 

The broken promises, shit slinging, and all pressures of who, what, where, why, when, and how? 

Who is going to clean up this mess? What are they going to do to fix it? Where will they need to push the hardest? When will these changes come into effect? How long before we remember that, regardless of core values, initial motivation, or the politics involved, it’s mostly just shit? Whether it’s wrapped in paper, plastic or all over the carpet, shit is shit.  

As we slip further into debates about who deserves to sit where and anxieties increase as we try to grapple the less of multiple evils, I’m filled with not-so-fond memories of potty training my kids. I find it equal parts fascinating and terrifying how much training someone to drop shit into a bowl mirrors the science of politics.

1. Both situations involve trying to get someone who is probably full of shit to do what we want them to.

2. Bribery seems to be a very common occurrence in both cases.

3. Even though we’re supposed to have most of the power, the shit-filled people seem to hold all the cards.

4. We may feel obligated to trust folks; even though we have been lied to repeatedly in the past.

5. We continue to believe, against innumerable odds, we will get a heads up before any shit happens.

6. There’s often a lot of smoke and mirrors to distract us from the fact that shit is going down right under our noses.

7. It’s always highly suspicious when shit gets quiet, and it’s usually a signal to prepare for bad news.

8. There’s a lot of secrecy regarding what’s going behind closed doors, and we’re usually really disappointed to find the mess that’s been left behind.

9. Quite often, by the time we have all of the facts, the shit has hit the fan, and there’s a heavy amount of clean-up involved.

10. There is a disturbing lack of shame or accountability involved whenever there is an “incident.”

11. No matter how much undeniable evidence there is, people covered in shit will attempt to deflect responsibility; fully convinced it’s not their fault.